r/ProgrammerHumor Aug 12 '22 Silver 10 Wholesome 11 Helpful 3

What’s stopping you from coding like this?

Post image
36.4k Upvotes

5.8k

u/rotutenoranudo Aug 12 '22 Silver Helpful Wholesome Bravo! Table Slap Facepalm

That way your projects never leave the sandbox environment

888

u/ADMINISTATOR_CYRUS Aug 12 '22

Now I understand why this guy is in a sand pit, thanks for explaining the joke

81

u/sergeantoof2 Aug 12 '22

Hello ender non

49

u/ADMINISTATOR_CYRUS Aug 12 '22

Hello guy spitting out something

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u/macmac360 Aug 12 '22

I don't like sand

27

u/WARROVOTS Aug 13 '22

It's course, irritating, and gets everywhere.

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u/cmk256 Aug 12 '22

Opened comments just for this joke

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u/MisThrowaway235 Aug 12 '22

Fuck that's good.

16

u/qwaszx2221 Aug 12 '22

I literally just assumed that was what the picture was, a visual pun of coding in sandbox...

30

u/porky11 Aug 12 '22

I didn't get he's just sand boxing.

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u/povlov0987 Aug 12 '22

The chair is stuck you psycho!

931

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22 Silver Helpful

[deleted]

187

u/Ok-Gur-6602 Aug 12 '22

Put tracks and motors on that thing.

185

u/dicemonger Aug 12 '22

129

u/The_Boring_Brick Aug 12 '22

This looks like something the military would do to recruit disabled people, just add a few guns and it's perfect

66

u/Raestloz Aug 13 '22

You know full well one of these days they'll have a war movie where some burly dudes are waiting for the "legendary" general and out comes a scrawny dude sitting on that thing

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u/QuestionableSarcasm Aug 13 '22

we call them "tanks"?

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u/The_Boring_Brick Aug 13 '22

Tanks are way bigger and more protected

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u/atomicwrites Aug 12 '22

What is the purpose of this thing? It looks like a product.

EDIT: Ok actually it makes sense hunter hunter2

26

u/Salanmander Aug 12 '22

That's funny, the second one is showing up for me as *******. What's the product name?

10

u/Fish-Knight Aug 13 '22

hunter2

6

u/dluds10 Aug 13 '22

******? Is that what everyone else sees?

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u/adminssucc Aug 12 '22

Bruh they're really selling a bunch of pvc pipes and 4 wheels of cheese as a wheelchair for a thousand bucks

6

u/Terr_ Aug 13 '22 edited Aug 13 '22

I bet it's tied into the US health insurance billing crap.

Edit: To be more specific, I'm suggesting the company knows that enough potential customers either (A) have to buy these only from an approved vendor, or else (B) can can get reimbursed by up to X for a "medical" beach-chair-with-wheels. Therefore the price rises to what that odd market will bear.

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172

u/RealWitty Aug 12 '22

Thank you! Nearly 20 comments down and someone finally points out how much of a nightmare manipulating that chair will be!

Like, get ready to ding your head of that perfectly positioned, tiny table when you inevitably forget that you can't just push back from the desk anymore, lol.

42

u/Kat121 Aug 13 '22 All-Seeing Upvote

I have four cats. Ain’t no way I’m sticking my bare toes in there.

4

u/dasookwat Aug 13 '22

Don't worry about your toes, you're sitting in their new, favorite toilet.

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u/CastIronGut Aug 13 '22

Oh fuck. That thing is in the absolute perfect position to crack your skull if you fall directly back. Dear. God.

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u/MrNozo Aug 12 '22

You make it so you push the table back, not the chair. Ezpz

4

u/BookPlacementProblem Aug 13 '22

Table is stuck, too.

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u/SkillInfamous7928 Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 13 '22

Having a cat

27

u/TheMossyHermit Aug 12 '22

Wait I want to change my answer

12

u/Adromakh Aug 12 '22

Works as well for children

11

u/8200k Aug 12 '22

I would not even trust my dogs with that.

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u/mybadalternate Aug 12 '22

There it is.

26

u/Irritated-Crow Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 12 '22

Watch out for that landmine

Edit: I can't type... I mean, autocorrect.

6

u/Narrow-Chef-4341 Aug 12 '22

My cat would be worried that I was stuck.

‘Why you no leave litter box?’

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6.2k

u/PhilippTheProgrammer Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 13 '22 Silver Wholesome

The thought of how annoying it would be to clean up all that sand I would be dragging all across my apartment whenever I stand up.

Edit: Seriously? 5.7k upvotes for such a lazy comment? Be a bit more responsible with your votes, people!

3.0k

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

That’s the trick, you never leave

2.0k

u/icantevenonce Aug 12 '22 Helpful Wholesome Dread

You call it a sandbox, I call it a litter box.

372

u/SamenVerkoster69 Aug 12 '22

I wasn’t a fan at first, but now this sounds like something i should give a go

154

u/VonRansak Aug 12 '22

LPT: Replace one corner with clumping kitty litter.

77

u/chocobrobobo Aug 12 '22

Don't forget to kick afterward, otherwise you might still smell it from your desk.

87

u/ComfortableCandle560 Aug 12 '22

Yeah but don’t actually cover your waste just kinda kick the litter out of the box

50

u/Ok_Combination6416 Aug 12 '22

And if it isn't cleaned often enough for your liking, just take a dump on the kitchen floor.

23

u/Editthefunout Aug 13 '22 Facepalm

No you can just aim for the side and have it run down the outside of the box

7

u/Alaskan_Tiger Aug 13 '22

That's what I would do

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u/stilldebugging Aug 13 '22

Way ahead of you!

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u/heyyy_man Aug 13 '22

Shit on the floor.gif

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u/onlyhav Aug 13 '22

No bro take a tip from a pro, take a dump on the couch next to the roommate who feeds you, while they're on a work call to make money to feed you.

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u/06210311200805012006 Aug 13 '22

protip: you can hang your ass off over the side. still get good litter feet feels, still send a message to The Man

15

u/genghismom71 Aug 13 '22

We have three cats. One of them, I still have not figured out which one, has taken to somehow throwing their fresh turds against the wall when they try to cover it up. Some portion of said turds then sticks to the wall. I appreciate the effort, however misguided, to cover up the crap but at this point just don't even try to cover it up. I'd rather scoop it off the top of the litter than have to srcape it off the wall. I ended up putting foam project board on the walls. It does the trick and can be wiped off. When it wears out I just throw it away. Sometimes I question why I consent to be owned by cats at all.

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u/genghismom71 Aug 12 '22

My three cats would definitely call it a litter box.

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u/Medium_Ad_6447 Aug 12 '22

I put sand in a couple areas of my yard for landscaping.. now my dogs roll through it every morning and then run ragged through the house and all our beds. Best idea ever says them.

13

u/delvach Aug 12 '22

You must be Little Orphan Annie.

Because your dog is SANDY.

16

u/PKnightDpsterBby Aug 12 '22

My parents thought putting sand around a trampoline would prevent people from getting hurt. Wrong. Neighbor kid fell off and broke his arm and cats shit in the sand all the time.

8

u/AnAquaticOwl Aug 12 '22

Shit. Could've just hit the neighbor kid with a crowbar. Same effect, way less effort

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u/Pfapamon Aug 12 '22

Damn, came here to write exactly the same ...

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u/900penguins Aug 12 '22

“Use this one simple trick to never have to go to the bathroom”

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u/Creepy_Consequence43 Aug 12 '22

My cat will probably poop in it.

11

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

I call it a self cleaning shit bucket

9

u/sandboxlollipop Aug 12 '22

Either way, don't drop your food in it and try to eat it after

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u/100percentish Aug 12 '22

The best posts on reddit are the ones where both of the things I would say are at the top.

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u/Glazeddapper Aug 12 '22

You are a cat

5

u/Vulpes_macrotis Aug 12 '22

We're not the same.

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u/gnudarve Aug 12 '22

There is a hole in that chair you see.

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u/FlamingDragonSpear Aug 12 '22

Some people call that a bad idea, I call that a good idea.

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u/Jac0b_0 Aug 12 '22

More secure if you stay in a sandboxed environment

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u/extreme_snothells Aug 12 '22

You must be a manager. Lol

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u/RandomlyMethodical Aug 12 '22

Also impossible to adjust the chair or get in/out of it. The wheels are absolutely buried in that sand so it sure as hell isn’t moving while you’re sitting in it.

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u/vegeto079 Aug 12 '22

A chair you could easily lift would probably work better than wheels

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u/Livid_Ad_26 Aug 13 '22

Maybe if you put skis on the chair?

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u/Beneficial_Squash-96 Aug 12 '22

Also the sand is going to get in your computer.

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u/The_great_pew_pew Aug 12 '22 Narwhal Salute

I don’t like sand, it’s course, rough, irritating, and it’s get everywhere

32

u/GangsterofPoliteness Aug 12 '22

Too fast for me, you clearly had the high ground

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u/TristanaRiggle Aug 12 '22

Beat me to it. XD

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u/Solocle Aug 12 '22

I hate sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere.

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u/No-Measurement8931 Aug 12 '22

I DONT LIKE SAND

- Anakin Skywalker

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1.5k

u/Pervez_Hoodbhoy Aug 12 '22 Helpful

Common sense

329

u/TheAJGman Aug 12 '22

Are you that user the designers keep talking about?

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u/tunaricelemonjuice Aug 12 '22

Hahahahhahaha

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u/Affenskrotum Aug 12 '22

isn‘t programming the only job where common sense does not make you better, but only witchcraft does?

15

u/ghin01 Aug 12 '22

Man wish I can use my magicraft to align center div

8

u/tekchic Aug 13 '22

Vertically even. With differing content heights. Sorcery, I tell you.

EDIT: Shhhh don't say flexbox. ;)

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u/Synec113 Aug 12 '22

You misunderstand. The guy has a really bad roommate that he can't get rid of. Now, whenever he has to poop, he does it in his litter box while making eye contact with the roommate.

"it's a lifestyle choice, and eye contact really helps me make. Help a roomie out?"

Roommate will be gone quickly, or if they're really stubborn, they'll wait until he drags his ass across the floor to wipe.

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u/Garfield4You Aug 12 '22

The mess

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u/OneTrueKingOfOOO Aug 12 '22

Okay hear me out, what if instead of sand it was floam?

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u/need-morecoffee Aug 12 '22

Kinetic sand.

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u/WildResident2816 Aug 12 '22

Ooooh I bet that would feel cool in the toes though

57

u/PM_ME_FIREFLY_QUOTES Aug 12 '22

For the price of kinetic sand, only the staff engineers would be able to afford to fill a box that big.

57

u/WildResident2816 Aug 12 '22

Down size to a box just big enough for your feet

42

u/InternetAnima Aug 12 '22

Here's the real engineer

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u/Scary-Try994 Aug 12 '22

Optimists believe the glass to be half-full.

Pessimists believe the glass to be half-empty.

Engineers know that the requirements incorrectly specify a glass twice the size of what was needed.

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u/angiedoessports Aug 12 '22

I feel like most engineers I know would have specified a glass 2x as large to end up with a 3x margin of of safety.

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u/zebediah49 Aug 12 '22 edited Aug 12 '22

$3/lb or so. Times 3" times 6' times 6' times 1.7g/cc.

Put the price around $3k.

I suspect one could make it in bulk though; not sure what the chemistry that's been done to it is. time to go hunt down a MDS.

E: It's a few percent PDMS. I really should have seen that coming given how closely it resembles silly putty. Weirdly I can't find that by the bucket, but it's $30/lb in a big egg. So if we can make it at around 3%, we'll be down to $1/lb and $1000 for the whole thing. That said, exact polymerization status changes the properties of PDMS by quite a lot, so we might need to either mix it with a silicone oil, or use an alternative with different properties.

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u/Virtual_Barracuda_54 Aug 12 '22

I bet you could make it. Might still be expensive but I bet you could.

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u/thuanjinkee Aug 12 '22

Real engineers make their own.

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u/Accomplished_Sir_861 Aug 12 '22

...i really like this idea

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u/morgancbest Aug 12 '22

Magnetic sand would work! So much more satisfying too

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u/finc Aug 12 '22

Until your graphics card seizes up and you wonder why

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u/gdeLopata Aug 12 '22

1000000000000000000000%

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u/Seb-Corry Aug 12 '22

I primarily work in C++. I don’t want my apartment covered in sand every time I compile my codebase

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u/jwr410 Aug 12 '22

You could call your dev environment the C shore.

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u/qu83rt Aug 12 '22

She sells C shells by the C shore, the C shells that she sells are C shells I'm sure..

It's actually pretty fun making your own shell, I made one with C++ that can easily pipe all output through my super fast C++ lolcat implementation, including just running anything it doesn't understand through the default shell on the machine..

On a side note "red leather, yellow leather" (keep repeating out loud as fast as you can) is a tongue twister straight from the Pitts of hell.

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u/a1b2c3d4e5f6g8 Aug 12 '22 Silver Helpful Wholesome Take My Energy Bravo Grande!

The sand. It's coarse and rough and it gets everywhere.

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u/godRosko Aug 12 '22

What else to get you in the mood for killing children... Processes.

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u/Comment90 Aug 12 '22

when two useful features love eachother very much, they create a bunch of useless little shits called bugs.

needless to say, I joined the dark side and downloaded the most controversial skyrim mod.

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u/imGnarly Aug 12 '22

Also irritating

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u/bwssoldya Aug 12 '22

Came here looking for this comment. Not disappointed

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u/TimaeGer Aug 12 '22

They could’ve easily made the same thing with grass. That would be actually really good. But no. They use fucking sand. Why would they use sand? Inside???

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u/Smooth-Zucchini4923 Aug 12 '22 Silver

People in this thread just don't appreciate good design: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WqjUlmkYr2g

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u/mr_nancys_lime Aug 12 '22

I see you are also a person of culture

13

u/Smooth-Zucchini4923 Aug 12 '22

A man who sits for something stands for nothing.

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u/n8mo Aug 13 '22

I was looking for this comment lol

Love Krazam

9

u/buzziebee Aug 12 '22

When this sand desk was posted to this thread, a lot of people laughed. They thought it was ridiculous. Who's laughing now?

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u/FloridaManActual Aug 12 '22

came into this thread to post this vid. nice

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u/Expensive_Marzipan13 Aug 12 '22

They is so much wrong doing in this picture

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u/DaMarkiM Aug 12 '22 Take My Energy

If you cant even clean up memory properly after you are done with it there is no way your mom is gonna let you have a sandpit in your room.

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u/chuckitoutorelse Aug 12 '22

Everything about this is wrong. The table, chair, one screen and that's before getting to the sand.

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u/merlinsbeers Aug 12 '22

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u/chuckitoutorelse Aug 12 '22

Need me stackoverflow screen and twitch screen.

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u/porky11 Aug 12 '22

This community doesn't exist.

Maybe I should create one.

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u/Coh-Jr Aug 12 '22 Wholesome

When i encounter hard problem, i tend to suck my toe. I dont like sandy flavour so no

308

u/mango_94 Aug 12 '22

This raises more questions than it answers

83

u/Awanderinglolplayer Aug 12 '22

Like does he have to pull down the programmer socks everytime?

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u/Gamesdean13 Aug 12 '22

Nah he probably wears toed programmer socks

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u/meatsweet Aug 12 '22

Mmmm moist sock toes

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u/LPO_Tableaux Aug 12 '22

Also how does a programmer have that kind of flexibility??

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u/Informal-Lead-4324 Aug 12 '22

Is that why you just sit in the office suckibg your toes all day?

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u/tutocookie Aug 12 '22

Maybe he sucks everyone toes so it isn't weird

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u/Informal-Lead-4324 Aug 12 '22

I'm so sick of these woke offices making me suck EVRRYONES toes

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u/belkarbitterleaf Aug 12 '22

Ahhh, this is what my senior dev means when he says test in the sandbox first

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u/stevep772 Aug 12 '22

Brian Wilson style!

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u/busydoinnothin Aug 13 '22

Can't believe it took approx 20 comments to finally see this reference!

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u/fazebozo Aug 13 '22

The brian wilson setup

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u/Grobanix_CZ Aug 12 '22

I don't like sand. It's coarse, rough and irritating. It gets everywhere.

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u/SlickDillywick Aug 12 '22

Apparently the other commenters have never heard of Darth Plageus the Wise

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u/Ok_Combination6416 Aug 12 '22

It's not a story the Jedi would tell you.

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u/Kaizero Aug 12 '22

Is that Picci 3? 👀

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u/buzziebee Aug 12 '22

Gianni Roberto is the greatest designer the world has ever seen, and it's no exaggeration to say this.

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u/Voliker Aug 12 '22

Fucking finally, at least one reference to one of the greatest channels in the wild

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u/Larkin563 Aug 12 '22 Silver

The 2 super thin threads of self respect I have left

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u/Lucky-Ge Aug 12 '22

This wheels in sand are just KILLING me

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u/Far-School-2571 Aug 12 '22

The fact I don't like vacuuming now

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u/Big_Deugan Aug 12 '22

Common sense

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u/Akuma_Kuro Aug 12 '22

"My wife"

(Don't have one, but I am pretty certain if I had one, she would be against this)

On top of that, I hate sand.

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u/blissed_out Aug 12 '22

Brian Wilson did this with his piano

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u/OsiyoMotherFuckers Aug 12 '22

Holy shit did I have to scroll way down here to find someone else who recognized the Brian Wilson reference.

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u/dgoodmiles Aug 13 '22

I also was surprised

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u/Pm7_ Aug 12 '22

Chair mobility and pets

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u/An_D_mon Aug 12 '22

I have cats. I don't need them to be getting any ideas about having a new giant toilet

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u/SudoPuff Aug 12 '22

A profound fear of insects and spiders. I’d have myself convinced every single weird feeling from the sand was a bug or something.

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u/batmassagetotheface Aug 12 '22

I guess the main thing is not wanting fucking sand all through my house 🤷

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u/porky11 Aug 12 '22

Why does he have wheels on his chair?

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u/nichdos Aug 12 '22

The fact that’s he’s still putting his pc on the floor is utter madness and I cannot abide.

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u/Edited_by_god Aug 12 '22

Sand overflow

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u/halfsieapsie Aug 12 '22

Can't believe noone said "cats"

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u/-TV-Stand- Aug 12 '22

The sand castle (very epic)

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u/randomlyrandomreddit Aug 12 '22

Can replace that with a lawn full of green grasses. Just found my weekend diy project. Thanks

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u/Faljake Aug 12 '22

Common sense

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u/m3nation007 Aug 12 '22

You can't escape this sandbox.

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u/JQB45 Aug 12 '22

Having lived in Florida and other sandy places in the past, you do eventually end up hating sand...

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u/RandyTheJohnson Aug 12 '22

You could say he's working in the... sandbox environment

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u/LauraTFem Aug 12 '22

Basic sanitation, mostly.

Even if the sand is clean on day one, how in the world do I clean it after my bare feet have been in it for five days?

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u/nealfive Aug 12 '22

cats. they'd use it like a litterbox lol

3

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '22

Next level sandboxing

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u/Elektriman Aug 12 '22

Rolling chair in sand is a bright idea

3

u/DealcraftYT Aug 12 '22

The fact that I don’t have a sand box underneath my table